I'd like to apologize in advance for this post. It reveals me as small and rather useless (and this, on Good Friday!), but I couldn't help myself. The spousal unit is out of town, it is after midnight, and for many nights now I've been rendered sleepless by my own hacking cough and the hacking coughs of all three of my children. Please understand. Please forgive.
Let me first acknowledge that I am not worthy to wash Alicia Keys' car(s), dust her furniture, tie her shoes or water her houseplants. There is more talent pulsing in three millimeters of her left earlobe than there is coursing through my entire body. I think she is fabulous; I think she is beautiful. Now. Having said all that, I would like to ask what, exactly, is going on here?
I need the name and address of the person who thought the feathers would make everything okay.