Cat Urine, Random Writing, and Things I Do Not Understand

Vida has kindly informed me that if you shine black light on cat urine, the urine will glow. I don't know exactly what to do with this nugget, but I'm sure it'll come in handy at some point. Like when I want to extricate myself from a strange close-talker at a holiday cocktail party.

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Random list from a random Word .doc:

The heart is listening
The heart is weary
The heart is taking a nap
The heart is three girls
The heart is no what you think it is
The heart cannot feign sleep
The heart wanders lost in the wood
The heart is hard of hearing
The heart cannot make up its mind
The heart is laughing at your poorly told jokes
The heart thought you were kidding
The heart is bored
The heart forgets to rewind
The heart doesn’t know how much a stamp costs

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Saturday's fundraiser raised well over $100,000. With people gamely bidding $4,000 on an item worth a third of that, it's really no surprise. Did the fundraiser, in fact, take place in a bubble floating high above the cares of the rest of the country? Was it simply a freak occurrence? What accounts for the open wallets and carefree generosity? I'm estatic, but I do not understand. Other things I do not understand:

1) Why does John McCain keep insisting that he wouldn't have to run attack ads if Barack would just agree to do joint townhall meetings? How does that even make sense?

2) Why do socks disappear, and where do they disappear TO?

3) Why is Sarah Palin getting away with so much shit?

4) Why is Lea's brain wired in a way that makes it impossible for her to put her damn backpack in the damn back hallway, dammit?

5) Why did it take me so long to discover Joe's Jeans?