Friday, September 24, 2004

The Game of Baseless Admonitions

I was about a hundred pages into Norman Rush's Mortals when I ran into this paragraph and could not stop laughing. Here is Ray Finch ruminating on recent changes in his marriage to Iris:

There were other things in their past...like the game of Baseless Admonitions, where one of them would shout completely arbitrary or inappropriate injunctions and warnings and accusations at the other, like You love only gold! or Be true to your school! or...what others? This means war! Christ, there had been dozens of these canards and where were they now? You mate with any beast! had been another one, thank you very much. Why had the game dropped away? This was an interesting question, and so was the question of who had been the first one to stop initiating these exchanges.

Of course I've been inventing Baseless Admonitions ever since. Mine are Baseless Admonitions Addressing No One In Particular:

You favor paisley!
Nothing but rubbish!
Remember the Alamo!
Your torpor grows old!
Men don't have bangs!

I am so easy to entertain. Pleasant weekend, one and all.

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