Friday, December 31, 2010

An Apology to My Family


I just finished reading Lord of the Rings last night, and I feel I owe my family an apology for several things related to said reading. Like, for example, disappearing for hours at a time. Or not making it to the grocery store. Or not wrapping gifts as prettily as I might have were I not anxious to get back to the book. And also for referring to my children as "Risa, Vida, and Lea of the Shire." But most of all, I think I should apologize for the following statements and a dozen others like them:

Statement: The Dark Lord calls.
Translation: I'm going to bed now.

Statement: I have scaled the black mountains of Mordor. I have battled on the Fields of Pelennor.
Translation: Sure, I'll play a round of Clue.

Statement: I prefer the trees and flowers of Lothlorien.
Translation: No, I will not consider a camping trip in 2011.

Statement: Beware the web of Shelob, my halflings. Away!
Translation: Clean your bedroom. Or else.

I am wishing you and yours all the delights of Middle-Earth in 2011. Make merry and be safe. I'll see you back here in the new year.

4 comments:

Nina B. said...

So funny! I was trying my hardest not to laugh out loud while reading this :D

Thank you for dropping by my blog, glad you liked my review for Angelica's Daughters. I'll be really honored to have it linked on your blog.

Brush Up On Your Reading

ver said...

Nice of you to swing by, Nina! My epic fantasy binge continues: I finished A Game of Thrones and just started the next in the series, A Clash of Kings. I'm getting cross-eyed already!

Am gonna link up soon!

SkeltonTheatre said...

Oh, these comments are just brilliant! I was giggling as I read them and can totally picture you saying each one:)

ver said...

I'm really glad I finally read it; it didn't feel right just being familiar with it via the films! Plus now I can break into geekspeak anytime I like...